Future Seer.

Not much going on, my in-laws are visiting for a fishing trip and traveling the New England states (There was a mention of going to Canada?). So this is just going to be a discussion post.
I like taking time and looking back and comparing it to where I am now. Ten years ago when I imagined my life as a 25 year old it was nothing like how my life actually is now.
But honestly I think the majority of that change as to do with my decision to join the military. Which was something I never considered doing. I was raised with the thoughts of: "When I graduate high school I'm going to college, I will get degrees in things and then get a job."
My biggest challenge was the realization that I had no idea what I actually wanted to do as a career. Even as a teenager I knew my limits and what I was capable of, as well as how hard a job might be success-wise.
I wanted to be an astronaut, a psychologist, political leader, teacher, geneticist and so on.
I knew I was going to be none of those things over the next few years because:
Astronaut school is hard, and I'm probably not smart enough to get in.
Psychology is great, but being an actual psychologist would not be where I ended up, I'd most likely need to use my degree in another field, and I don't think I'm smart enough for a doctorate anyways.
I could never be a political leader because I don't care about ALL politics.
I couldn't become a teacher because everyone is doing that, and teaching degrees are only good for the state you get them in. I don't know what state I'm going to live in when I'm an adult. I need to be able to work anywhere in the country.
And genetics was once again a smart thing.
I'm not dumb, by any means. I am definitely above average (I've been tested multiple times for special programs), but if I'm not interested in learning it, or comprehend all of it I have issues.
Most degrees and jobs require a lot of, essentially, useless classes.
(#1 reason I won't get a degree in Meteorology even though that's been my job for years now)
But if I have to take a million math classes, or science classes I'm not interested in I won't learn it. I enjoyed chemistry, but I struggled a lot in all my chemistry classes. I couldn't imagine struggling in a class I don't care about. 
And we're talking about my thoughts as a 15 year old.
So now as a 25 year old, official adult, new civilian, I look towards the future and think, "Where will I be in ten years?"
It's good to ask these questions, to have long-term life goals. I hated them in school because I had no clue.
To this day I have no clue.

I wonder if anyone does.

And now that I'm married and living with my spouse I don't look at my future as just mine anymore. It's "our" future. Everything about his life will affect mine in one way or another.
Where he gets stationed, how long he stays in, promotions...
His life might affect my life more than my life decisions affect it.
So really at this point my life consists of just preparing for worst case scenarios, and praying none of them ever occur.
But there are things that I'm pretty sure will happen between now and ten years.
I will have my master's degree in (hopefully) library science. If not then I will have my BA in Social science and have done some sort of other degree. Because I will use every penny of my Post 9/11 GI Bill. Every Penny. 
I will have children. This is highly likely. Kids are something I've always imagined having in my late twenties. I just don't know how that will end up. I think having kids is scary. Sure, it's a magical process of creating a human life and some women take to it like ducks on water. I feel deep in my soul I will probably not be lucky enough to be one of those women. I think of having children and all I can think of is everything that could go wrong.
Though it could be because I'm not ready to have kids yet. My husband is not ready to have kids yet. If we have one, then that's fine, it was meant to be. But we are not mentally prepared to go out of our way to make a baby yet. So maybe my fears associated with that will change as I grow.

 In ten years, if my husband has stayed in the service till then he would have been in for 17 years! That means we're a skip and a hop from him retiring. Which is crazy for someone who is 35 to be thinking about. But that's only if the military doesn't try and change that before then. Either way, that's 17 years of service, we'll be looking at where we want to permanently settle to live out our lives. Deciding on whether we want to design and build our own house or buy one and remodel the crap out of it! That's some exciting stuff to think about.

Either way, I look forward to seeing where I end up in ten years, and looking back on my thoughts from now and chuckling at them the same way I do at my thoughts as a 15 year old.

I don't dread getting older. I think I've come to embrace the thought of it. I look at my in-laws and my parents and their lives have only gotten better with age. And they're not even old! So I guess my idea of being "old" might have become older than most's. And I'm okay with that. I plan on being around and doing things for a long time with my spouse.

Until then I'm just chilling in the uncertainty of the present, trying to figure out what dinner is going to be, and if my enrollment for school will work out okay.
But here is what I could look like as an old lady: I sort of look like my grandma. Which is awesome, because she is an amazing woman.

sore muscles.

Played soccer today. Something that I haven't done in forever. I can't remember the last time I played to be exact. It was a bit windy, so at first everyone tried to be pussies about it, but SSgt was not about to let that go down. Though volleyball would have been fun too. I am glad I went outside and played soccer, I can't remember the last time I had that much fun playing a sport...with the office even. :P I didn't get the ball a lot, but I did enough to throw people off their game to get them to make sloppy kicks. So I was proud. And I discovered sprinting back and forth isn't so bad when you don't think of it as sprinting. I definitely ran myself into the ground for no real reason at all other than to make sure I got a good workout during this. And I did, I'm sore all over. Even my back is sore and that confuses me. My arms are okay, you don't use those during soccer. (haha) So playing a fun sport I enjoy is something I'd like to do more often. I think if I did play soccer more I'd be better at running, because I do take bigger steps and move pretty quickly up and down the field. But when I'm running just to run I tire out way more quickly and take tiny baby steps. It's gay. Taking big steps is just tiring, I feel like I'm in a constant sprint, which I don't sprint far or for long. It's a losing battle every time.
Though I've decided I want to play badminton. I don't know why, but that's always a fun game. I'd like to try tennis, but that's only because I've been watching this anime (Prince of Tennis) and it makes tennis look like the most epic thing ever. So I need to try it so I can break through this delusion I have in my head about it. I know, I'm pathetic. But it's awesome. :P
I didn't really have a true topic for this post, I just want to keep to the once a week update thing. I took the time to make this, might as well post on it.
Though a thought I did have about soccer...people who showed up, who knows why, maybe they felt obligated because their peers would be there (and by peers I mean the people they live with), but hardly played at all. And then left! I was actually disappointed, but I guess like basketball isn't my thing, maybe soccer isn't theirs. It was a good game in that everyone was able to get involved at some point or another, and definitely more than once. But those who don't bother to play and give up are the ones who don't even try to get involved, who make it a waste of time. If I'm there I want to get something out of it, even if it is stupid basketball and all I do is sprints back and forth on the court.
I did discover there is a raquet ball court here though, so that might be worth investing some time into. I've played it a few times. I sucked horribly, but it was fun. Worth playing some more to better myself at it.
On a side note: Being here still sucks. I miss being on leave. I dread every minute I'm at work because I'm waiting for the Marine Corps to do something to add to the unhappiness of my life. Like give me unnecessary orders, or send me to stupid courses. I don't like the build up to every work day is dreading what I might be walking into. It's dumb. Life shouldn't be like that. Unfortunetly that's how people make it. *sighs* At least I work a weekend shift this time. I'll probably try and do some weather studying. I feel like I'm forgetting a lot of the finer facts I used to know and just do everything the easy way as of recently. Probably has something to do with my resolution of "Don't care" attitude. But I still want to be good at my job and be that one step above the majority. I don't know why. I just don't like to be looked down on at work. No matter the job. I'm here and I'm going to do it.
The end.